INDULGENCES FOR CROSS DRESSERS

Our creditors are at the door, our churches and cathedrals need immediate maintenance, our missionaries are crying for more support, and our donations are down down down! Let our troubles be your golden opportunity. Now for a limited time only the Vatican is granting indulgences for the remission of temporal punishment for the sins of cross dressing for a small financial sacrifice of penance. Buy one for yourself, buy one for a friend, buy one for a relative! They make great gifts. You can also feel good that you are supporting your own community since 50 percent of your penance will stay right in your own diocese.

$100.00 - closeted CD $500.00 - Public CD

$1000.00 - Full time CD $5000.00 - Post op TS

Hurry - this is a limited time offer

(non Roman Catholics - please add 15%)

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NEW FASHION TREND AMONG CROSS DRESSERS

SueAnn Button, Frostbite Falls Pickyune

A new style of clothing has finally hit the CD community years after it was made popular by many of the New York fashion houses. Men's clothing has become all the rage for CD's in most of the major U.S. and Canadian cities. After talking to some of the style setters from all four points we have found that the trend is by no means locked into one simple pattern. Friends from Toronto say skirts are out and permanent press trousers are in. Some NewYorkers told me that all the avant garde into sport coats and black Florsheim shoes. Our girls in Texas have gone to straight Levies and cowboy hats without feather headbands. Stores in Southern California have been mobbed every time the word gets out that some Johnny Carson suits are still in stock. The word is that out friends in Seattle are just desperate for camouflage fatigues. In the Mid West the girls just cannot get enough polo shirts and rugby jerseys.

Outer clothing is not the only new face we are showing the world. Our ladies in Orlando have been at the front of a revolution to give the boot to Bali, and make Fruit of the Loom the only acceptable lingerie. Panties are out - boxers are in! Stockings are gone - blue knee length socks are it!

Accessories have also made a major shift. The girls of Atlanta have dumped their hand bags for executive style briefcases. Fat gold nugget jewelry has become the uniform item of some of the CD groups in Chicago.

The movement to men's clothing has not been as smooth as some would hope. A number of cases of divorce have been reported because the CD husband has been spending money like mad on new men's wardrobes. An unnamed group in the southern U.S. has lynched one of their own members by her own tie when she arrived at a meeting in a Navy Blue blazer. The group's president said, "We know how to take care of them there perverts down here! " The "Church of Our Lady in Skirts" has been formed in Vancouver BC. with the goal to save their sisters to the south. Organizations in Europe, Australia, and New Zealand have been forming to combat what they conceive to be no less then gender heresy growing in North America. While they espouse the only proper clothing for the CD is the; traditional Femm fashions, a highly reliable source has informed me that more and more flats and sensible wool skirts suits are being seen on members of the New Zealand CD community.

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NEW TERMINOLOGY

'Transvestite. Crossdresser. Transgenderist. Transsexual Androgene. Male Lesbian. Gender dysphoric. Berdache. These words and others are some of the terminology used today to describe parts of your culture. Many articles have been written to lambaste any attempt to sub divide us by our behaviors. Personally, I think this movement has less to do with the anger at being categorized and more to do with being inaccurately categorized.

Why are our labels so inept? Why are they so obdurate? Why are they so hard to wear? Why do they fail us? Why? Because they are boring! Our terminology is dry, technical, academic historical, and no longer practical in the New Wave culture. We need new terminology that really describes us as we are now. Titles that are on target, politically correct, on the cutting edge, and most importantly fun! We need a movement of the masses to begin this revolution. If I may (and who the hell is going to stop me), let me begin by offering some suggestions for relevant terminology.

Heels on wheels: CD who sneaks out to drive the car. Girl scout: CD who picks up women. Boy scout: CD who picks up men. Fembot: CD who talks computers. Legal lesbian: Married CD. Mom 2/ the sequel: Married CD with children. No fun: Fundamentalist CD. Target: CD in public and not passing. Mailbag: CD who only writes to others. Future unemployed: CD who told someone at work. Getting under the skin: Wears lingerie only. Feet first: Shoe fetishist. Hanger hangup: still in the closet. Enemy within: Unaccepting wife. Pearl of great price: Accepting wife. Lost tribe: Unaccepting family. McCarthy's legacy: CD who disappearers from family and friends. Dream stuff: Female wardrobe. Freddy Kruggers: Fake nails. Gender birth: First time out in public. That time of the month: Dresses only occasionally. Opportunist: Dresses whenever possible. Solo act: Only goes out alone. Wearing the apron strings: Only goes out with the wife. Herding: Only goes out with other CDs. Matriarch: Leader of a CD group. Fashion reporter: Editor of a CD newsletter. 18th century lady: Must wear wigs. Curries: Uses own hair. Statuesque Beauty: Very tall CD. Half way there: CD with natural feminine looks. Curse of the Gods: Very masculine looks in a CD. Doe and buck: Wealthy CD. Lady Lush: Alcoholic CD. The other transition: Suicide by a CD. Casper: CD who disappears. Cosmic surgery: Cosmetic surgery for gender purposes. Bye Bye Bob: Nose job. Cheryl Tigress: Tall, blonde, Californian CD. Hunting big game: Shopping at store for large ladies. Doll clothes: Size 10 and below clothing. Under deep cover: Beard cover. Under growth: Beard shadow. Blender Alopecia: Shaving your body. The competition: CD who looks better then wife. The only half: Divorced CD. Biting the apple: Dressing for the first time. Ring master: Counselor for gender condition. Living stereotype: Gay CD. The silent one: Wife at CD meeting. Gender Patrol: CD police officer. Boats: Size 12 plus shoes. Out on Patrol: CD out on Halloween. Virgo: New age CD. Flaming Shaman: Berdache. BaD girl: CD into B&D. Home Maid: CD into acting like a maid. 50/50 mix: Wearing both male and female clothes together. "Porgy and Dress: CD pornography. Sibling rivalry: Gay and CD distrust of each other. Baby face: CD who completed electrolysis. Predators: Rip off vendors to CDs. Admirers: People who date CDs. Date with a doctor: CD who has scheduled SRS. Off the table: Post op CD. Bride of Frankenstein: Too much makeup. Sears towers: Tall CD in high heels. Second hand Rose: Wardrobe by "The House of Salvation Army". Invisible woman: passes full time. Barbie doll: Non sexual CD. Amnesiac: Post op who denies ever having been male. Baby dollys: Hormonally induced breasts. Toxic spill: Too much perfume. Christmas tree: Too much jewelry. American Beauty rose: Dressing like your mother. Kitchen queen: Dressing only at home. Plumber: SR surgeon. Keyboard manicure: Typing article for CD newsletter. Domatrix theory: Belief that all CD want to be dominated. Anaconda: CD who loves to wear corsets. X ray technician: CD who wears lingerie under male clothing.

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